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Dating a Divorced Man: Things You Need to Remember
No one wants to play second fiddle in a man's heart, especially not to the woman he once considered to be the love of his life.
This is a very real risk when you're dating a divorced man, and it's the reason why a lot of women don't bother. After all, why go through all the trouble? Why not be with a man who hasn't married someone only to change his mind later on?
Who's to say he won't change his mind about you?
Pros and Cons of Dating a Divorced Man
It's true that dating a divorced man is not for the faint of heart. Sometimes, it may not even be worth it.
But if you do it right, it can also be the epitome of second chances — a testament to the saying that as long as you're alive, you should never give up on love.
Marriage may be the ultimate declaration of love and commitment, but not everyone gets it right the first time. Love doesn't come with a manual, and many of us stumble through life using the trial-and-error method.
When dating a divorcé, you have someone who knows what it looks like when a relationship doesn't work out or when love simply isn't enough. He'll have significant experience, and chances are he won't have the patience to fool around again.
This is great if you're looking for a serious and committed relationship. A guy who got divorced once and still wants to give love another shot is often straightforward. He doesn't want to waste any more time. Having learned from his mistakes, he will also know how to treat you better.
Unfortunately, not all divorcés have this kind of mindset.
Sometimes, dating a divorced man will mean dealing with someone who doesn't want a committed relationship anymore. His failed marriage made him believe love isn't worth it, and he just wants to have fun.
Or he can think he wants to love again, but in reality, he's still not over his ex-wife. That's not good, either.
So, how do you tell the difference?
Questions to Consider When Dating a Divorced Man
You can't always plan ahead when it comes to relationships. But if you can, it helps to be prepared.
Below are some questions you can ponder when you're dating a man who used to be married — or better yet, even before you start dating one:
Is his divorce final or is there a chance for reconciliation?
Will you be dating casually or are you looking for a long-term commitment?
Does he have kids? What do they think about their father's love life?
What was the reason for his divorce? Was it his fault?
Is he really ready to date again?
Not all of these questions can be answered right away or are even appropriate to ask.
But at the very least, you should consider knowing more about the guy you want to date before doing something you might regret in the future.
How to Make It Work
The best way to approach dating a divorced man is by making sure you're on the same page.
Not everyone moves on from a past relationship at the same pace, so you can't compare your guy with other divorcés you've met before. Maybe he's just looking for a rebound. Or maybe the timing is just weird and it took a premature marriage for him to find you.
As long as you're careful, you're welcome to try and find out which is which. After all, wouldn't it be great to be someone's second chance at love?
